I haven’t been properly sick in a long time. By that I mean throwing up. I can’t actually remember the last time. Probably not in the years I’ve been doing this diary. Maybe when I was a kid.

But today I am sick. I am not sure why. I woke up in the middle of the night to the room spinning and feeling very nauseous. I went to the toilet but nothing happened. I went back to bed.

Woke up to the alarm, thinking I would be OK. But as soon as I got out of bed I had to sit down by the toilet. After a little time I was eventually sick. It was horrible, but not as bad I thought it would be. It felt good to some extent. A good old purge and I felt better immediately. So I tried to drink my usual morning coffee. Bad idea. Out it came.

The original sick was just clear white, nothing in it. The coffee sick was coffee. So I gave up and just drank little bits of water, and risked a dry toast. I’m still super hungry, which is making me worse. And have a caffeine headache.

It’s all very weird. My stomach has done its job, but is now upset over something. My worry is that I ate something I shouldn’t have yesterday at the post-funeral food eating (hopefully not meat?). I did have a weird routine yesterday, but that shouldn’t make me feel sick. I felt fine last night, and if it was something else J would surely have felt it too, as we both ate the same evening meal last night.

Now I just feel washed out. I am, as previously observed, a pretty rubbish ill person. I mope and moan and sit around thinking everything is awful when actually it could be much worse. I guess I just need to relax, but I can’t. Relaxing is not really something I know how to do…

Worst of all, it’s the weekend. Though we normally work on a Saturday morning, it’s never usually too taxing. But it’s going to be a nice rest of the day, and Sunday too to come. And I’m feeling rubbish. The summer has been really cruel like this – last bank holiday weekend the weather was awful, despite generally a very good summer indeed. The timing of things just keeps annoying me. And now, summer is over…

Time for a lie down.