Rest?

Tuesdays and Thursdays are my normal day of rest at the moment. Weekends tend to be fairly busy doing lots of random stuff with my family.

So today is one of those peaceful days. There’s not all that much to do, but at the same time, there is an awful lot I could be doing. The reason why I can’t though, is that they almost all revolve around my football team, which is stagnating at the moment because of the involvement of my parents.

Put simply, they are just too busy to deal with the club. I spend all my time nagging them to do this, that and the other that I’m now really fed up with it. They can’t take decisions, and when they do, they tend to go against them. Which then makes them even less likely to take decisions in the future. It’s a terrible trap to be in.

What I need to do is to find some people who want to take over the overall administration of the club. Yet that is almost impossible. I want to run it, but I don’t want to run it with my mum and dad. They don’t share my ambition to make the club larger, to make it more professional, to get Charter Standard awarded from the FA. Which is fine for them, but frustrating for me. If I could do what I wanted, I would bring in new club officials, but could leave my dad as the manager of the one team we have at the moment. That way he can just concentrate on what he wants to do. He isn’t interested or motivated in bringing people together to make everything run smoothly.

So, in theory, I could be spending my time today doing all the things that we in the club need to to get the pre-season preparations sorted. But that’s not going to happen. Instead, every time I think I’m going to get some time to sort things out, something else happens which takes my parents attention away from it. I can understand that, as they have lives to lead. But I think it’s got to a stage now where they’re going to have to accept that they just don’t have the time to do what is necessary.

Most of these distractions relate to my family, and then the extended family, who are useless at the best of times. They also like to use us a lot. My elder sister, for example, despite being 28, and living in her own home just down the road, effectively lives here with my nephew, who I see as more of a brother because of this situation. This puts enormous strain on my mum and dad. My younger brothers and sisters don’t get the attention they deserve because my mum and dad are still dealing with my sister, who is so unindependent it’s untrue. To take one example, at least once a week there will be a call at 9:50pm or thereabouts, telling my mum that the electricity has gone off because the meter has ran out of money, so can she go round to her house, pick her up, take her the shop to charge the meter up again and then take her home.

I see the strain this puts my mum and dad under, and it gets me a bit annoyed. My sister can’t look after herself. She can’t take responsibility. And if my parents try to say anything to her, she throws back an enormous level of guilt-tripping.

It’s not exactly the nicest environment to be living in. The dynamic of this family is very frustrating. As for the extended family, I would go on forever if I wittered about their annoyances.

All of this brings me to the conclusion that I always keep coming back to. Much as I like my family, I still don’t think I can live with them. I definitely do not want to live here, in this city, all my life. I either have to move elsewhere within Britain, or preferably, emigrate to another country altogether.

Rest? There’s almost no time for it when my head is always formulating different plans to enact the changes I want to see. But still the opportunity to take them is too little. I can only hope that the potential of my life is much enhanced once I have my two degrees in the bag, and am able to unlock the doors which will let me cut the ties to here.

Seems terrible to say it, but I am beginning to accept this inevitability now. There comes a point where families do very little other than impede. It’s sad after they spend all your childhood and adolescence bringing you up and making you what you are. I couldn’t have got to where I am now without them.

Yet now I realise that to get further, I need to get rid of them. What a great way of saying thanks…

Advertisements
Previous Post
Next Post
Leave a comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: